The Environmentalist’s Lord’s Prayer

Lord's prayer
O Mother Spirit Gaia, Mother Nature
Worshipped be thy Name.
Thy earth be green,
Thy kingdom fill the globe and return to exquisite wilderness all traces of modern humanity (excepting my comfy 21st century home with its amenities).
Give us today less human beings – which currently number in plague proportions
And reduce humankind to sustainable numbers to restore nature’s ecological balance.
Prevent global warming and other global catastrophes, but
Leave my high-end consumer goods – smartphones, laptops, flatscreens, and high-comfort lifestyle completely untouched
While making damned sure everyone else reduces their carbon footprint.
For the land, and the seas, and the skies should remain pristine and untouchable by mankind
Both now and forever.



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