For I’m a Christian Nominal. I’m warm on the inside
By holding firm to platitudes that I take for my guide.
No creeds for me – that “belief” thing just feels like too much work
For mushy brains like mine. Such hard-thinking I do shirk.
Forgiveness? Yes I’ll accept that. But no repentance – mind.
All talk of sin and judgement – cut it out: I am refined.
Kirk membership requiring of me not one single thing
Will suit me best. And from the pulpit: lots of waffling.
I’ll do discipleship I guess – without obedience
Required of me: as this is best, and makes a lot of sense
To make the path as easy for me as you surely can.
I am the future of the church: a luke-warm, fuzzy, man.
And blessings! I love blessings! Persecutions? No, of course!
What fool would want such hardships? That’s the cart before the horse!
But give me joy abounding please! But without righteousness –
For that we can well do without: today we need it less.
Results without obedience is what we teach today.
And so I get to heaven by this easy, pampered way.
Why shouldn’t I? I’ve earnt it! And this broad and easy path
Avoids the straight and narrow. Who’d walk that? O what a laugh!